Confusion is getting the best out of me. I am lost within the perplexity of my own brain and heart. The two of them are the protagonist and antagonist of my life. Fighting which of them is right and wrong. All i know is that one of them is just casting me off in more pain, paranoia and depression. This condition seems hopeless for me to resolve.
At one point I’ve thought that I’m already done with our post break up but more pain is just coming every freaking day. The very thought of not getting back together is very grueling for me to swallow. It is hard for me to diversify myself from her and her whereabouts. I'm too terrified just by knowing that anytime soon, she might just be tainted by someone else and all of my actions that I’ve put just to protect her will be gone just like that.
She doesn't even comprehend why i am acting like this. In retrospect, i resent all that had happen between us. We used to be sweet, sensible and very much in love with each other, but all of her feelings were wiped away. The star that i know or should i say, the girl who was with me every day, who i shared my life with, who wanted to take pictures with me are far gone.
I’ll be okay. I’ll just have to accept the reality that she already put our relationship behind her. This will be the last time that I will put myself in depression just by thinking of her. I’m tired.
No comments:
Post a Comment